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Alias
Episode 1.17, "Q&A"
Written by J.J. Abrams
Directed by Ken Olin
Hey, it's the clip show, aka Alias for Dummies, aka ABC called and told J.J. that they love his show but no one understands what the fuck is going on. This would have been less irritating if they had at least given us some meat to chew on for the next ep, but the preview is also a bunch of old clips. Gah!
Anyway, Syd's been captured by the FBI and is hauled in for questioning. Of course, the oily guy questioning her is none other than Terry O'Quinn, who plays this shifty, flinty kind of character so often I am beginning to suspect that is merely his personality. Anyway, Terry grills Syd about her involvement with SD-6, so she goes back to the very beginning, taking us on a little tour of her career and the first 16 episodes of the show. Watch Scruffy Danny obnoxiously bellow out a song while proposing to Syd. See Syd discover dead Danny in the bathtub. Groove to the kickin' montage of Syd in all of her costumes. Seen it! A good two-thirds of this ep is recycled material.
At least the new stuff is wonderfully executed, providing for a few heart-stopping moments near the end. While Syd cycles through the various clips, Daddy B. and Vaughn conspire to free her and go through with this whole convoluted plot to prove the prophecy wrong. Daddy B. is wonderfully kickass and brusque throughout, adeptly nailing Haladki to the hood of a car without batting and eyelash. Haladki, see, has some interesting FBI connections that further enhance his general rattiness. As the other half of the team, Vaughn is, of course, adorable, and gets able assistance from Sean of Felicity. Go, Sean! Your line of Shmeghan clothing is flying of the racks and you're a CIA agent!
The only other interesting thing that happens in this episode is Sydney driving her car into the ocean whilst trying to escape the FBI. Very cool move, and she even pulls another Bond and uses the air in her tires to breathe. Oh, also, Syd thinks Mama B. is still alive…and that she might be the woman Rambaldi referred to in his prophecy.
All this stuff is pretty cool, though Sydney's hideous Florida retiree disguise - frumpy gray wig, velour sweatsuit and gigantic shades - is so awful, I almost can't take her seriously in the tense car chase scenes. I'm like, where's the Gucci? The sequined halter-top? Do something about your hair!
Anyway, as far as clip shows go, this one is way better than that Real World/Road Rules: Battle of the Seasons thing that was on last week, where Lindsay kept repeating everything fellow co-host Mark said in this wacked "Just Jack!" fashion and all the clips were of stuff we've seen a million billion times because that is approximately how many times MTV shows RW/RR: BotS per week. Enough with Jisela bitching "I want to know!" and crazy-ass Belou ending all of her sentences with "yo." Though, actually, that part is kind of funny.
What? Alias? Oh, right.
Anyway, high marks for the big revelations and the teaming of Daddy B. and Vaughn, demerits for putting me to sleep with stuff I've already seen before. Next time, they should just have Daddy B. and Vaughn as a goofy buddy comedy duo, introducing all the clips and engaging in good-natured banter and song interludes in between. Just an idea.
Episode Rating: 6 out of 10
Sarah Kuhn can't think of any redeeming aspects of velour. You can read more of her nerd-centric insights over at Entertainment Geekly.
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