Whipped

Whipped, written, directed and produced by Peter M Cohen, is every bit as bad as you've heard. And I get no pleasure in admitting this as Mr. Cohen is a good friend of one of my buddies. Be that as it may, I have very few good things to say about this mess.

The major malfunction here is that there are no sympathetic characters. They are all losers. You don't like any of them. Each of the guys is a "Beavis" incarnate, and Mia, Amanda Peet's character? Well, let's just say she's not the type you bring home. She thinks she's doing the feminist cause a favor by whoring herself to as many as seven men at the same time, and turning the tables on these mysoginistic pigs.

Everything in Whipped seems forced. At times, the dialogue is a fairly funny. All the sex lingo these idiots spout out is stuff you've heard before at bars or a fraternity party. In fact I laughed quite hard at the discussion of the "strange hand" manuever. But every single euphemism for coitus and masturbation in 90 minutes is enough to make anyone feel uncomfortable. The movie just goes overboard with its intent to shock. Not to mention its not believable either. None of these guys could get a girl, let alone one every weekend. Because if they can, I am doing something seriously wrong.

But I digress. Should you see Whipped? Actually, yes. I do recommend it. As much as I like to watch great movies, I think you should also see the ones that went drasticallly awry. My curiosity was piqued initially by the fact Peter M. Cohen is a recent graduate of the USC School of Film and Television, a program I myself am looking into. I must say I feel pretty good about my chances now that I know a piece of cinematic toilet paper like this can actually get distributed.

I will probably buy Whipped when it comes out. That way whenever some jughead says Highlander II is a really bad movie, I can say "whoa there, buddy....let me show you a little film called Whipped...." Have barf bags handy to avoid nasty accidents on your rug.

So just how bad is Whipped, you ask? The showing I attended had four people in attendence, including myself. By the end credits, I was the last man standing. I swear to god. It's that hard to sit through.

ultra "see whipped because it really is that bad" magnus