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Malibu's Most Wanted script review

If you liked Undercover Brother, then you'll love Malibu's Most Wanted. And if you laughed at Undercover Brother but just couldn't get passed how ignorantly portrayed Black people seemed to be (me!!), then you'll have the same sentiments towards Malibu's Most Wanted, only amplified a few decibles. You've no doubt seen the movie trailer by now so you know that MMW's main source of humor is putting the popular image of a Black rapper in the body of a wealthy White boy, Brad or B-Rad Gluckman (Jaime Kennedy), and watching this juxtaposition play itself out in the worlds of the rich and famous and down and out, respectively. The fact that all images are extremely exaggerated make them even more ridiculously funny. Funny, meaning that the first three quarters of the script is an absolute riot. After that, it sinks to the depth of utter stupidity due to recycled humor and surgically positioned special effects. I suppose some would describe the whole thing that way, but I'll be nice.

Jaime Kennedy and about thirty million others helped make this script possible. Haha. Obviously, there weren't thirty million others, only three (Fax Bahr, Adam Small, and Nick Swardson), but I am still shocked that it took three people to create a script having so little thought. I suppose it's like those superstars who pay millions of dollars to get that perfect hobo look down. This was a debut screenwriting credit for all involved, which speaks their talent in this area because the script is very well written. Taye Diggs, Anthony Anderson, and Regina Hall are alongside Jamie Kennedy as he attempts to carry this project on his shoulders. I won't hold Ryan O'Neal's playing Kennedy's father against him. I suppose we all need work every now and then.

Malibu's Most Wanted is pleasantly simple, but even so, I'm still fishing for its real purpose. Our Brad Gluckman comes from what the scriptwriters have characterized as 'good white folk'. They've given Brad everything he could ever want in the surreal environment of Malibu, CA except those bugger little things called love and attention. That lack of love and attention has, we're led to believe, been the major factor in creating the monster Brad has become. That is, immitating to the nth degree the gangster rap stars he took an early affinity for. His dad, Bill Gluckman, is running for governor of California and Brad's out of norm behavior could be costly to Bill's political aspirations. Therefore, a plan is devised to have Brad kidnapped by Black pseudo-gangsters who are paid to take him to the 'hood, aka a bad Black neighborhood where crime runs rampid and everyone is ignorant. This kidnapping is supposed to turn Brad into the good lily White boy he and everyone White are supposed to be. And with that, the effort to bring B-Rad into Bradley Gluckman is on.

While reading the script, I had to remind myself that it was supposed to be pure 100% concentrated entertainment. I had to put all logic and sense of cosmopolitan awareness to the side. Had I not done that, I simply wouldn't have made it past page 12, on which Brad has been ordered to see a psychiatrist, Dr. Feldman, in effort to remedy him of this rebellious hip hop boy phase.

DR. FELDMAN
Do you know why you're here?

BRAD
Here on Earth?

DR.FELDMAN
In my office.

BRAD
No.

DR.FELDMAN
Your parents tell me you want to be a... a...

BESS [Brad's mother]
A nigga!

BRAD
(to Bess)
I am, fool. Damn.

Now, I don't know what others may get out of that excerpt, but if Brad's thinking of himself as a Black person is equated with being a 'nigga' then....I just may have an issue. But, like I mentioned before, the rule of the game here was no thinking allowed. So, I moved on... until I got to page 18. There, a Black "ivy league-esque" political assistant to Brad's father (Blair Underwood's role) discusses the plan to kidnap Brad. Our appropriately named character, Tom, says this:

TOM
They [the kidnappers] take Brad on a 'tour' of the 'hood...give him a little taste of thug life. It might just...
(smiles)
...scare the black out of him.

Yes, you did read that correctly. Honestly, I didn't know whether I was supposed to laugh at jokes like these or sit back and linger on the fact that someone actually got away with passing those off as jokes. Disturbing realization.

I suppose now that I have bashed the script as being crude, and crass at various times, I will say that I enjoyed this script more when its jokes were directed at odd situations or stupid behavior. At least, then, I knew that it was okay to laugh. There are plenty of those throughout the script, and those helped me make it to the end.

Speaking for a moment on the script's supposed moral, I know what the screenwriters want it to be, but I'm not too certain that I agree. By the end of the film, Bill finally comes to accept B-Rad for who he says he is, a gangster rapophile. I can believe that B-Rap loves rap music, and I can believe that B-Rad loves hip hop culture. In this day and age, the idea of someone other than a Black person who likes and listens to hip hop is not so unbelievable. However, I can not believe that this movie ended without touching on any level the idea that one need not act the way Brad does just because he loves rap music and hip hop culture. That, to me, would have been a greater moral and a better resolution in the quest to unearth the real Bradley Gluckman.

- This has been a Miss Jones production.

Jean-François Allaire (aka DeadPool)

Questions, comments, praise etc. Email me at deadpool@tnmc.org

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Jean-François Allaire is TNMC's first columnist. At only 24 years old he has become a respected entertainment journalist, with his columns appearing in Corona's Coming Attractions and Scr(i)pt magazine. He also writes a monthly column in Screenwriters Monthly entitled 'The Last Word.' Hailing from Montreal this young writer is determined to dig up all the details on the movies before they hit your local theater. If you're part of a movie production then you really need to be talking to him.