Written by Steven Dougherty
Wednesday, 17 November 2004 15:05

We all know Lex is in to bondage, but this episode highlights his love of impulsive, anonymous sex, too.

Episode 4.09, "Bound"
Written by Luke Schelhaas
Directed by Terrence O’Hara
Guest Stars:  Jane Seymour (Genevieve Teague), Claudine Mink (Corinne Hartford), Cobie Smulders (Shannon Vell).
Air Date:  November 17th, 2004

All things come to those who wait. No superhuman, supernatural, or supershitty things happened this week. We’re finally treated to a Lex-centric episode, even though we still have to sit through bullshit having to do with "Spell". In case you were hoping last week was some sort of mushroom-induced hallucination shared by roughly five million viewers, you get proof positive that the whole witch plotline is firmly attached to Lana’s ass, or lower back if you prefer. The proof comes in the form of Jane Seymour; yet another of Christopher Reeve’s leading ladies makes an appearance. Seymour plays Jason’s mother, Genevieve Teague. Genevieve also appears in Lana’s dreams as a noble present at the witch Isobel’s death by fire. What connection the Teagues actually have to Lana’s present circumstances is up in the air at the moment, but it’s certainly supposed that Jason might not have met Lana by accident as he’s always believed. He seems to think his mother may have been involved in their meeting now, that’s for certain.

As for Lex, he’s busy getting laid. Clark seems oddly upset by this, of course. Go figure. Lex’s latest tryst ends in murder, though, which I’m guessing is atypical of his macking habits. The girl who dies happens to be a fan of Lex’s and a stalker to boot. Clark, wanting to help his friend, decides he’s not sure he trusts Lex to tell him the whole story. So Clark is upset at Lex for holding back the whole embarrassing truth? Hypocrites wear plaid, I hear. Clark goes to Lionel, thinking Lionel is involved somehow, but finds a changed man in that prison jumpsuit. It’s still hard to tell if Lionel’s being honest about his memory loss from "Transference", but Clark seems to think he’s legit. Of course, Clark’s also stupid, so take that for what it’s worth. At the very least, Lionel had nothing to do with this particular mess. The culprit was a former one night stand who went a little crazy when she discovered Lex has a pattern of sleeping with anonymous brunettes. She seduces him, drugs him, kills the stalker girl and frames Lex for it.

The entire thing ends with Lex bound to a chair, as he’s prone to be on this show, and about to die a death reminiscent of Isobel’s. Clark arrives just in time to do some weird, superspeed stripper twirl with his coat to extinguish the fire and save his best bud. I swear Tom Welling looked like he was dancing when he spun that coat around. It’s a pretty creative use of Clark’s powers, actually.  I feel they could have done something a little less, I don’t know, exotic dancer, though. Clark and Lex have a little heart to heart about Lex becoming his father. This time it’s not quite so sanctimonious. Personally, I don’t think Lex will become his father until he kills Lionel. At that point he'll have crossed the same line Lionel himself crossed so many years ago. Until then, Lex doesn’t quite hold a candle to dear old dad.

From a technical standpoint, "Bound" had a solid foundation from start to finish. They used Lana sparingly, which is never a bad thing. As good a person as Kristin Kreuk appears to be, I can’t hate this character more. It’s just not possible. Still, I have to admit she’s improved considerably since they dropped the whole Clark/Lana relationship angle. It’d help if they weren’t grasping at every opportunity they can find to have the two characters make out. Looks like next week, we’re getting more of that crap. I’ll talk more about that when it airs, though. Tonight, I give "Bound":

7 out of 10

This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it has gone in for the bondage thing before, and he has to admit it’s really, really scary.

 

 

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